That Time Someone I Know Went to Disney World

Intrigued?  Don’t be.  It’s time for me to be whiny.  BECAUSE IT’S BEEN FOUR MONTHS SINCE I’VE BEEN IN MY HAPPY PLACE.

sleepy dog

zzzzz….zzzzz….zzzzzz

Wait.

No.  Not that one.

THIS one.

Hello beautiful.

Hello beautiful.

This is always a trying time of year for me.  Being a seasonal passholder, I’m well aware of three things:

1.  Blackout season is fast approaching

2.  I JUST came back from New Orleans #shenanigans and need to recover – both financially and liver-ly(?)

3.  Absence makes the heart grow fonder. #HORSEPOOP   Absence makes Black Dog very, very whiny.  VERY.

crying-puppy-o

I WANNA GO TO DISNEEEEEEYYYYYYY!!!!!!

So as I really have nothing interesting, relevant, or even remotely entertaining to talk about at this particular moment, let me leave you with this little thought.

Should you find yourself suddenly immersed in all things magical – AND YOU HAVEN’T BROUGHT YOUR TEAM CAN-AM TEAMMATES WITH YOU – KELLIE – then you damn well better step up the virtual Disney tour guide role.  Romantic anniversary trip or not, WE ALL NEED A FIX.  So be a good Mousketeer friend/family member, and take care of those with less vacation time, depleted vacation accounts, and suffering from a severe case of the Disney DT’s.  It’s the least you can do.

happy disney kids1

Enjoy the ride.

Do you have a virtual battle plan when someone goes to Disney and you don’t?  Are pictures, videos, and virtual cocktails on your list of requirements for virtual Disney tour guide?  Have your loved ones failed miserably at this responsibility, or do they take it very seriously?

You Too Could Be A Disney Addict

I’m joining in on the magic that is the Monday Magical Mickey Linkup over run.geek.rundisney today.  Because that is what all the cool kids do.  Come check it out!

I’m an addict.  I freely – and proudly – admit it.

Thank the Phoenicians.

Thank the Phoenicians.

I really am addicted to this place.  Whether it’s cheesy gravestones at the Haunted Mansion, or holding intelligent conversations with the locals in Animal Kingdom…

"Quack, quack!"

“How YOU doin’?”

…I just can’t get enough.  And that’s never more apparent to me than when I have family visiting, but I’m not able to make my schedule work so I can heigh-ho the day away with them.  We do have a tradition in the Black Dog clan though that allows us to virtually do Disney with those of us who can’t be there.  It’s an unspoken rule that whomever is there, better make sure they send periodic video updates throughout the day/night.  So you can imagine how much my phone was blowing up all day long on Saturday.

Not my family.  But pretty damn close.

Not my family. But just as dysfunctional.

The addiction pangs were so strong this weekend that I even momentarily thought about actually getting up at the butt crack of dawn, making the three-hour drive, spending the day on a kamikaze run through the parks, and making the three-hour drive back home.  Note I said MOMENTARILY.  I don’t think there’s enough cappuccino and Thermonex in the world that could’ve gotten me through that insane of a day.   But I thought about it.  And realized I’ve got it bad.  REALLY BAD.

We mss you Black Dog!!!!

We miss you Black Dog!!!!

Ever get that feeling in the pit of your stomach that something’s just not quite right?  And I’m not talking about that second helping of questionable-meatloaf-looking-substance-you-found-buried-in-the-back-of-your-fridge kind of feeling.  I’m talking about that feeling like you’re running low on a very important vitamin or mineral.  Or perhaps you forgot to do something extremely important, but you just can’t quite put your finger on it.  Worry no more, I know EXACTLY what the problem is.

What's an elephant to do?

What’s an elephant to do?

So if jumping in your car and driving to Disney World isn’t really an option, I can only offer the next best thing:  kick everyone out of the house.  Have comfort food readily available, (shrimp pasta and salted caramel dark chocolate work quite well).  Find the closest furry black dog and insert on lap.  Spend the next six hours watching Maleficent, The Lion King, and 101 Dalmations (BOTH versions).  If your Disney itch hasn’t been scratched by then, well, there’s only one thing left to do.

driving to disney

There’s just no use trying to fight it.

Safe travels.  And don’t forget the periodic updates.  They’re mandatory.  Or else……you’ll be kicked out of the family.

 

Enjoy the ride.

Did you ever feel like you’re missing Disney World so much that you just might go insane if you didn’t get a quick fix?  What did you do about it?  Ever do Disney virtually?  Did it help, or did you wind up curled up in a ball on the couch, incoherently mumbling quotes from random Disney moves?

The Best Way To Do Disney – Adult Style

What’s the first thing you think of when someone says the word Disney?  Screaming children?  Screaming parents?  Bruised calves from getting run into by strollers?

Damn strollers...

Damn strollers…

One of the things that keeps me going back again and again is the ability to do a “kid-free as possible” Disney.  Want to know how?  I could tell you but then I’d have to, well, you know.  Okay, not really, but these are closely guarded grown-up secrets.  Don’t tell anyone else, okay?

Don't tell ANYBODY!

Don’t tell ANYBODY!

Pay attention now, ’cause I’m only going to say this once.  Unless I have another blonde moment and forget.  Which happens a lot.  Really.  A LOT.  (hubby snickers in the background)…

adult Disney

Keep in mind, this is just MY idea of doing Disney adult style.  I deny any knowledge of shenanigans you may encounter, nor am I available for bail money.

1.  Drinking around the world in Epcot – probably one of the most common shenanigan-making schemes for the over-sized Disney kid.  I can’t even count the amount of customized t-shirts I’ve seen boasting of said endeavors.  Of course, by the time most of these braggarts have reached Africa, they’re usually pretty much in a permanent face plant position.

Wha???  I can make it to Germany.....

Wha??? I can make it to Germany…..

2.  Getting the last available Fast Passes for the day – or just waiting until you see a monumental breakdown of a parent’s sanity while waiting in line for Space Mountain.  Then striking while the tempers are hot.  But tread carefully my friends, as that Everestal breakdown, (like what I did there?  Yeah, impressed myself too.) could quickly turn its fiery flames in your completely innocent direction.

I don't wanna go on Space Mountain! Suck it up Dad!

“I don’t wanna go on Space Mountain!
Suck it up Dad!”

3.  Make dinner ressies at a restaurant where no parent in their right mind would bring a kid – Victoria and Albert’s anyone?

victoria-and-alberts1

I’ll have the escargot followed by the Beluga caviar, accompanied by a bottle of the 2009 Chateau Margaux. And a side of chocolate milk.

4.  Search out the little hidden corners – you never know what you may stumble across.  Like this hidden gem at the Boardwalk Inn.

Ahhhhhhh.......

Ahhhhhhh…….

5.  And what may be my personal favorite – casually, (and loudly), mentioning how there’s a free annual pass giveaway contest in the farthest remote corner of the hotel, thereby leading to your pick of best pool chairs, seats in the hot tub, or uninterrupted poolside bar service.  Not that I’ve EVER done anything even remotely as unDisney-spirited as this.  Not once.  Ever.  Swear.

Where'd everybody go??

Where’d everybody go??

I’m sure there’s plenty more you could come up with to make your next Disney trip more adult-oriented.  Feel free to add them to the list!  There’s just one requirement, which I’m sure you can figure out without too much trouble. #shenanigans

 

Enjoy the ride.

What do you do to make your Disney trips more adult-like?  Does it include shenanigans?  Or security being called?  Would you like it to??

 

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, It’s Off To Disney World We Go!

Yep!  I actually DO have more interesting things to vomit out of my brain today, but since we’re going back to DISNEYWORLD tomorrow – yes, TOMORROW! – I can’t really concentrate on anything else.  Nor do I want to.  Because almost everything else becomes completely insignificant when one is about to embark on a quickie – STOP IT – to the World of the Mouse!!!

Yes Black Dog!  We're waiting just for YOU!!

Yes Black Dog! We’re waiting just for YOU!!

To those of you who have yet to see the light – you know who you are (dearest husband) – my barely contained excitement is something of a mystery.  Exactly how does one explain the lack of focus on mundane tasks, hours spent listening to Disney related podcasts, and ceaseless humming of It’s A Small World?

Can't stop humming it now, can you?

Can’t stop humming it now, can you?

To set the record straight, this IS just a quick little weekend getaway, and not a complete week-long immersion of all things Disney.  And even though I freely admit I wasn’t putting anything over on the hubs when I oh-so-innocently suggested that we need to build up some Marriott points and why not conveniently do that in Orlando – I’ll never be sorry for coming up with the first of what I’m sure will be many exciting, brilliant, Mouse-inspired ideas in 2015.

I'm going to Disney World!!!!

I’m going to Disney World!!!!

So if your life turns out to be incredibly boring this weekend as you try to convince your legs that they really CAN move again after last weekend’s Dopey escapades, feel free to stalk me on social media.  I guarantee at least a few daily images of all kinds of shenanigans.  Because…..why else does one venture to the place of all things magical?  For basic good times and baby meltdowns?  Oh HECK no.

NOT going to be me.  Until I have to leave.  Then all bets are off.

NOT going to be me. Until I have to leave. Then all bets are off.

So come along with me dear readers.  It’s going to be magical!!!!

 

Enjoy the ride.

How spectacular was your last trip to the Mouse?  Where’d ya go, what’d ya do, how many miles did ya run, how many cocktails did ya down?  Were Mickey ice cream bars and Mickey muffins involved?  Did anyone throw up on any rides?  Tell me!! Tellmetellmetellmetellmetellmetellmetellmetellmetellme!!!!