Friday Funny

As I’m currently on my yearly jaunt to the City of All Things Shenanigans, I thought I’d start off your Memorial Day weekend with a little taste of the Crescent City.  Happy weekend everybody!

FF NOLA cat

 

Enjoy the ride.

Laissez les bons temps rouler!  Let the good times roll on this holiday weekend everyone!  What kind of shenanigans do you guys have planned?

 

The South Florida Edition of Run Where I Live!

Because where I live is AWESOME….

#heavysigh

#heavysigh

Okay, well not EXACTLY here, but you get the general idea.

When Danielle asked me to be a part of the cool kid’s club, I played it, well, cool.  “Yeah, well, let me think about it and I’ll get back to you.”  N-O-T.  It was actually more like this.

Whooooo hooooo!

Whooooo hooooo!

Along with a bunch of other equally cool kids, Danielle came up with the great idea of taking you on a virtual running tour where each of us live.  Cool, right?  Right? RIGHT???  Soooooo, I bet you’ll never guess where I’ll be taking you.  Go ahead.  Guess.  Guess again.  Nah really, guess.  No idea?  Heeeheeeheee, silly wabbits. Twicks are for the twopics.

Try saying THAT five times fast.

Uhhhh....

Uhhhh….

Once you untwist your tongue from your left ear, follow along with me as I take you on a short little journey NOT to the beach.  Sorry kids, I’m just keeping it real.  Real close.  Like across the street from my crib close.  Because the powers that be in my little corner of the universe were kind enough to provide us lowly residents with a dog-friendly, duck-friendly, dingo-friendly, well-marked running path.  (Actually I’m just guessing on the dingos.)

The dingos ARE the babies!

The dingos ARE the babies! HA!

So come along with me to a little cozy place called Coconut Creek, Florida.  More specifically, a lovely little spot known to the natives – well, everybody actually – as….cue drum roll here…..Sabal Pines Park.

See?  Sabal Pines Park.  The dingos are chillin' in the bushes.

See? Sabal Pines Park. The dingos are chillin’ in the bushes.

Coconut Creek – aka the Butterfly Capital the World – is doing it’s best to be a green city.  We get to reap the benefits by having numerous parks and walkways throughout our pretty little ‘burb, and Sabal Pines is no exception.  Located about five minutes from the north end of Fort Lauderdale, Sabal Pines has three baseball fields, one softball field, a couple of smaller ball fields for the smaller human units, and a couple of combination football/soccer fields.  ‘Cause, you know, us Americans are a little confused when it comes to what sport actually requires the use of feet.

Surrounding all this confusion, is a paved and concrete 1.15 mile path, marked approximately every 20-30 feet with…..wait for it…..PAW PRINTS.  Because we are JUST THAT AWESOME.

parkpath

Thought I was kidding about the paw prints, didn’tcha?

If you start at the conveniently marked start/finish line, and go toward the north end of the park and follow the path to the southwest, you’ll come out by the soccer fields.  Head south towards the water and guess what?  The locals will be only to happy to greet you with a flurry of feathers and quacking.  They often even get so excited, they just poop right on the spot!  So watch your step.  I like to consider it a stretch of a Spartan race.

Watch out for land mines.  They're not deadly, but tend to be bit slippery.  This is a public service announcement courtesy of Black Dog Productions.

Watch out for land mines. They’re not deadly, but tend to be a bit slippery. This is a public service announcement courtesy of Black Dog Productions.

As you run the path, you can always zoom your way into the main park building for pit stops and water.  There’s also bathrooms and a water fountain on the east side of the park near the tennis courts.  Two paws up for this one as the water is always nice and COLD.  That’s a BIG score when you’re running in 95+ degree heat.  The park rangers are also usually buzzing around in golf carts in case you need any help.  There’s also ample parking next to the tennis courts and by the main building near the big playground.  Remember not to leave anything of value in your car.  There have been a few burglaries over the years, even with all the traffic in and out of the park, so just be smart about it and leave your bling back at the home base.  You look fabulous in just sweat dahling.

I’ve found this little slice of park paradise to be perfect for timing Mr. Galloway’s Magic Mile, as you don’t necessarily have to have a GPS with you to confirm the exact distance.  It’s also great if you want to do so some quarter-mile repeats, as the pavement is marked at each – you guessed it – quarter mile!  Nice stuff, ain’t it?!

Overall, even though there’s not a lot of shady spots on this path, it’s clearly marked, flat, and not usually too crowded if there’s not a sporting event taking place.  The bathrooms are clean, the water is cold, and the natives are friendly.  What else could one possibly want?  You can even motor across the road and meet me in the pool for a nice post-workout cool down!  Just have your people call my people and they’ll see if I’m available.

Come on in, the water's fine!

Come on in, the water’s fine!

So that’s about it for a quick little running journey through the tropics.  If you ever happen to hyperspace to the northern end of Broward County and you’re looking for an easily accessible, well-hydratable, slightly poopy decorated running path, check out the ‘burbs and Sabal Pines Park.  I’ll be waiting for you at the end with a margarita and bowl of Moose Tracks in hand.  Because that is HOW WE ROLL here in the Creek.

Make sure you follow along on Danielle’s virtual tour of running HERE!  Her blog will have links to all kinds of cool places to run written by those peeps who know them best.  We even get to blast over to Aussie Land for a bit o’mate time!

Ready for some more running in the Sunshine State?  Your next stop on the Run Where I Live party train will be near our favoritest place ever.  Yes, we are headed to Orlando!  Yes, THAT Orlando!  The one with MICKEY!! So jump on board ’cause the train is departing.  Next stop, See Jess Run!  ALL ABOARD!!

 

Enjoy the ride.

If you’d like to make your hometown another stop on the Run Where You Live Road Trip, submit your link to Danielle at Live, Run, Grow, and she’ll gladly add you to the list!

That Time Someone I Know Went to Disney World

Intrigued?  Don’t be.  It’s time for me to be whiny.  BECAUSE IT’S BEEN FOUR MONTHS SINCE I’VE BEEN IN MY HAPPY PLACE.

sleepy dog

zzzzz….zzzzz….zzzzzz

Wait.

No.  Not that one.

THIS one.

Hello beautiful.

Hello beautiful.

This is always a trying time of year for me.  Being a seasonal passholder, I’m well aware of three things:

1.  Blackout season is fast approaching

2.  I JUST came back from New Orleans #shenanigans and need to recover – both financially and liver-ly(?)

3.  Absence makes the heart grow fonder. #HORSEPOOP   Absence makes Black Dog very, very whiny.  VERY.

crying-puppy-o

I WANNA GO TO DISNEEEEEEYYYYYYY!!!!!!

So as I really have nothing interesting, relevant, or even remotely entertaining to talk about at this particular moment, let me leave you with this little thought.

Should you find yourself suddenly immersed in all things magical – AND YOU HAVEN’T BROUGHT YOUR TEAM CAN-AM TEAMMATES WITH YOU – KELLIE – then you damn well better step up the virtual Disney tour guide role.  Romantic anniversary trip or not, WE ALL NEED A FIX.  So be a good Mousketeer friend/family member, and take care of those with less vacation time, depleted vacation accounts, and suffering from a severe case of the Disney DT’s.  It’s the least you can do.

happy disney kids1

Enjoy the ride.

Do you have a virtual battle plan when someone goes to Disney and you don’t?  Are pictures, videos, and virtual cocktails on your list of requirements for virtual Disney tour guide?  Have your loved ones failed miserably at this responsibility, or do they take it very seriously?

Let The Shenanigans Commence. Again!

Once again, Black Dog Productions is making our annual jaunt to the scene of the crime…and our favorite place for Black Dog shenanigans.  Because that is what we do best.

HERE. WE COME.

HERE. WE COME.

Want to be a part of the shenanigan making?  Want to feel as though you’re RIGHT THERE WITH US?  Then come along for the virtual nuttiness tour via FaceBook, Twitter, or Instagram.  From the food, to the drinks, to the food, to the drinks, to the….well, you get the idea, you’ll feel as though you’re right in the middle of the insanity that is sure to amuse, bemuse, and – let me just throw it out there – very possibly shock you!  Because that is how we roll here at BDRD.

Hang on.

It’s gonna get a little crazy.

Life is short.

So make sure you…

Enjoy the ride.

Have you ever been to New Orleans?  Did you partake of shenanigans NOLA style?  Did they involve Hurricanes, horses, or perhaps an unfortunate incident with a horse wearing Mardi Gras beads?  Don’t ask, just go with it…..

What’s With All the Hoop-La???

Yup.  Never saw it coming, did ya?

Final Four

I may or may not have mentioned it before, but here at Black Dog Productions, we are a multisport dog house.  Running, soccer, football, baseball, we follow it all.  For a little change of pace this year, we decided to change things up a bit, and satisfy our ugly competitive battle of the sexes natures by jumping on the March Madness Bracket Bandwagon.  I won, hubby lost, he pays for lunch.  #suckstobehim

happy dance

However, to his credit, I was sitting with the game show dollar machine in full swing, unable to grab onto a single friggin’ blog post idea, when he threw out one of the GREATEST IDEAS EVER.  (Not really, but I’m going to let him think so.  If for no other reason than he’s just so damn cute.)  This is going to take some input from you guys so pay attention.  You too.  Yeah you.  The one in the back not paying attention.  Hey!  TURN OFF THE DAMN DUAL SURVIVOR MARATHON AND PAY ATTENTION.  THIS IS IMPORTANT STUFF HERE.

Does this bandanna make my dupa look fat?

Does this bandanna make my dupa look fat?

As we sit here watching Gonzaga and Duke duke it out, (get it?  DUKE it out? hehehe, I CRACK myself up!), wondering which is going to be the last team to make it to the Final Four, let us throw this poser out into the running world.

Final Four Races

Let’s hear it runners!  Are you a diehard Disney fan or more of a Marine/Boston/New York kind of schlepper?  Love those Rock ‘n’ Roll runs, or prefer the insanity that is Ragnar?  Or do you prefer those little local jaunts, where you know that guy who lives just north of Fort Lauderdale Beach always has a keg tapped in his driveway around mile 7 of the A1A Half/Full Marathon?  INQUIRING FURRY MINDS WANNA KNOW.

No rules here.  Any location, any distance, timed, not timed, we don’t care.  Let’s just see what everyone comes up with.  You never know, you just may find a new race you want to try.  That’s the beauty of race bucket lists – like my average race pace, it’s never consistent and always open to change.  Wait a minute, that’s not exactly a GOOD thing, is it?  Hmmm….

Wait.  What? Huh?  What was the question again?

Wait. What? Huh? What was the question again?

Enjoy the ride.

Get those phalanges moving people!  We want to know what your fave races are and what makes them total packages of awesomeness.  Is it the people, the places, the drink/snack selections?  Or, perhaps even the on-course entertainment?  (Have no fear, Team Can Am will be taking requests again at this year’s Wine and Dine.)

You Too Could Be A Disney Addict

I’m joining in on the magic that is the Monday Magical Mickey Linkup over run.geek.rundisney today.  Because that is what all the cool kids do.  Come check it out!

I’m an addict.  I freely – and proudly – admit it.

Thank the Phoenicians.

Thank the Phoenicians.

I really am addicted to this place.  Whether it’s cheesy gravestones at the Haunted Mansion, or holding intelligent conversations with the locals in Animal Kingdom…

"Quack, quack!"

“How YOU doin’?”

…I just can’t get enough.  And that’s never more apparent to me than when I have family visiting, but I’m not able to make my schedule work so I can heigh-ho the day away with them.  We do have a tradition in the Black Dog clan though that allows us to virtually do Disney with those of us who can’t be there.  It’s an unspoken rule that whomever is there, better make sure they send periodic video updates throughout the day/night.  So you can imagine how much my phone was blowing up all day long on Saturday.

Not my family.  But pretty damn close.

Not my family. But just as dysfunctional.

The addiction pangs were so strong this weekend that I even momentarily thought about actually getting up at the butt crack of dawn, making the three-hour drive, spending the day on a kamikaze run through the parks, and making the three-hour drive back home.  Note I said MOMENTARILY.  I don’t think there’s enough cappuccino and Thermonex in the world that could’ve gotten me through that insane of a day.   But I thought about it.  And realized I’ve got it bad.  REALLY BAD.

We mss you Black Dog!!!!

We miss you Black Dog!!!!

Ever get that feeling in the pit of your stomach that something’s just not quite right?  And I’m not talking about that second helping of questionable-meatloaf-looking-substance-you-found-buried-in-the-back-of-your-fridge kind of feeling.  I’m talking about that feeling like you’re running low on a very important vitamin or mineral.  Or perhaps you forgot to do something extremely important, but you just can’t quite put your finger on it.  Worry no more, I know EXACTLY what the problem is.

What's an elephant to do?

What’s an elephant to do?

So if jumping in your car and driving to Disney World isn’t really an option, I can only offer the next best thing:  kick everyone out of the house.  Have comfort food readily available, (shrimp pasta and salted caramel dark chocolate work quite well).  Find the closest furry black dog and insert on lap.  Spend the next six hours watching Maleficent, The Lion King, and 101 Dalmations (BOTH versions).  If your Disney itch hasn’t been scratched by then, well, there’s only one thing left to do.

driving to disney

There’s just no use trying to fight it.

Safe travels.  And don’t forget the periodic updates.  They’re mandatory.  Or else……you’ll be kicked out of the family.

 

Enjoy the ride.

Did you ever feel like you’re missing Disney World so much that you just might go insane if you didn’t get a quick fix?  What did you do about it?  Ever do Disney virtually?  Did it help, or did you wind up curled up in a ball on the couch, incoherently mumbling quotes from random Disney moves?

You Like Me! You Really Like Me! Again!

I received an awesome-sauce surprise a couple of weeks ago from a fellow I-live-in-inhuman-like-heat-and-I-almost-well-pretty-much-love-it blend named Helly.  She writes a great little blog aptly named Helly On The Run.  And much to my surprise, she found this particular little corner of the interweb….wait for it…..INSPIRING!  Now be assured, no exchange of cash, bribery, or promises of Princess Lisa’s Bailey’s Buttercream cupcakes, has taken place.  A common love of traveling – especially to Italy – may have been the beginning of a beautiful blendship.

Vaticano

Vaticano!

Whatever the reason may have been for dragging Helly kicking and screaming to Black Dog Runs Disney, (oh crap, did I say that out loud?), I’m sending her a big, wet, sloppy Calypso kiss for the nomination.  So here goes.

Muah!

Muah!

So let’s get to the good stuff.  First of all, the good part.

Whoo hoo!

Whoo hoo!

Now for the rules – ’cause we all know how much I LOVE rules (teeheehee…):

Rule One – thank and link to the person who nominated you – check!

Rule Two – list the rules and display award – checkcheck

Rule Three – share seven facts about yourself – oh boy, this could get ugly

Rule Four – nominate 15 other awesome-sauce bloggers and let them know they’ve been nominated.  I’m going to “adjust” this one just a little bit and nominate the blogs that make me laugh the most – because that’s the whole point of living isn’t it?  That and Moose Tracks Ice Cream. (like how I ALWAYS find some way to work that in?)

So here’s some little known facts about me…

7 facts

More than you ever wanted know huh?  Especially the Sponge Bobs.  There’s an image you won’t ever be able to get out of your head.

Now for just some of my fave blends! (There’s just so many, I can’t list them all…oh the humanity!)

blog list

Back yet?  Didn’t I tell ya these bloggers rocked?  Black Dog would never steer you wrong, especially when it comes to blogs and ice cream.  Never.  I take that stuff seriously.

 

Enjoy the ride.

What are some of your favorite blogs?  Do they make you laugh?  Do I make you laugh?  If not, just think of the Sponge Bobs.  Or go get some for yourself.  I’ll even buy you a pair.  I’m nice like that.