…job?

As I was sitting on the Boardwalk one day, watching the birds trying not to look like they were begging for crumbs of my chocolate chip Mickey muffin – like THAT would ever happen – I started to wonder.  What’s the one job at Disney World that totally ROCKS?

If you think about it, there’s got to be a bazillion jobs in Mickey World.  Okay, maybe not quite a bazillion, but you know what I mean.  From the cast member picking up litter all the way up to Bob Iger, there is certainly a wide variety of jobs both in Disney World and with the Disney Company itself.  So what do you think would be just a few of the coolest jobs to have?  Well…I’m glad you asked.  I’m going to keep this list short as this could result in actual loud, physical altercations among the most die-hard of Dorks.  We can be pretty fanatical about our beloved Mouse.  In case you haven’t noticed.

3. Horticulturist: I include this on my list out of sheer jealousy.  Describing my gardening abilities as having a black thumb is being somewhat generous.  If one could kill an already dead plant, that would be me.  Flowers actually shudder in fear and turn their lovely blossoms away whenever I happen to meander by.  And I swear I’ve even heard some hushed whispers sounding something like, “Quick! Just play dead now, before she thinks she can glue your petals back on.  Again.”

I can actually take a beautifully blossoming plant, completely ignore it, and it will keel over dead.  But Black Dog, you can’t IGNORE a plant!  You have to lovingly nurture it, feed it, water it, talk to it.  Yeah.  When I do that, I kill it.  I’m screwed either way.  That is why I think it would rock to be a flower growerer(?) person.  AT DISNEY.  Have you SEEN the stuff these masters of all things green have come up with?!?  SHEER. FREAKING. AWESOMENESS.

I liked it better when she didn’t talk. But don’t tell anyone.

2. Imagineer: Oh to be one of those artsy, creative types!  Need to create a lion king who exudes magnificence and regalness but can still wrestle around with his kid?  Sure, no problem.  Want to scare the crap out of unsuspecting guests and leave their guts lodged somewhere up in their brain when an elevator drops out from under them, but regular old free-falling isn’t good enough?  We gotcha covered.  Need to make a big tough guy scream like a baby by sitting a ghost next to him?  Easy peasy.  These creators of all things amazeballs are the epitome of thinking outside the box and pushing boundaries.  Not unlike myself.  Hehehe…..

Bet YOU can’t make an owl out of snowflakes!

1. And now, what I think is the COOLEST job of them all—–wait for it……….

CRITTER CARETAKER!

(applauseapplauseapplauseapplauseapplauseapplause)

Excuse me, I think you may have a monkey on your leg.

Not that I’m a fan of confined critters, but I think Disney does an amazing job at recreating natural habitats, encouraging natural behaviors, and providing top notch veterinary care.  And there’s just SO MANY ANIMALS.  Springboks and hippos and giraffes, oh MY!  I’m thinking even the lousiest day with a giraffe nursing a sore throat is still better than taking first place at the Wine and Dine Half.  Say WHAAAAAATTT?!?!  You did NOT just go there Black Dog?!  Oh yes, YES I DID.

How YOU doin?

Now I know there’s a dupaload of other sweet jobs at Disney that would probably rock your world.  So let’s hear it!  Tell me all about what you think would be your Disney Dream Job.  We can always argue about it later.

Enjoy the ride.

Let’s hear  it!  I want to know what you think the coolest Disney occupation is.  C’mon now, don’t be shy!  Throw it out there, I won’t bite.  My new lions might, but not me.  At least, not as hard as they do.